TUSH LOST IN AFRICA!

File:Passage through jungle Papanasam.JPG

View of the jungle area where Barack Obama is believed to have been born and where Tush Limpole is now missing. A search party is enroute to the tribe where Limpole issued his last communication with the outside world.

Right wing talk radio host Tush Limpole is reported missing in Africa.

According to a spokesman for Limpole, the radio host traveled to the Dark Continent in search of President Barack Obama’s real birth certificate.

The radio host departed from an undisclosed Caribbean Island where he was fellowshipping with a number of female companions. He landed in Nairobi the capital of the east African nation. From there he hired a caravan to move into the tribal regions deep in the interior of the country.

Tush was reportedly traveling with $250,000 in US currency.

Limpole was scheduled to meet with the chief of the Boowanga tribe who claims Barack Obama was born to the tribe and delivered by a tribal mdiwife. His birth was registered in Nairobi.

The meeting was delayed when the chief reneged on the original terms of the sale of the birth certificate insisting on an additional $50,000 before he handed over the document.

In his last dispatch, Limpole told associates that he was slated to meet with the chieftan in late afternoon. During a brief encounter Limpole described the chief as very tall and dressed in traditional tribal clothing which consisted of a very colorful headdress, a long, flowing, embroidered robe and a five hundred dollar pair of Ferragamo loafers.

Before he handed over any of the money, Limpole insisted on seeing the original certificate. He was then permitted to send a photocopy of the certificate to Nairobi for examination.

UPW news has obtained a copy of the copy and has transmitted it worldwide across its news wires. Experts in Nairobi have declared the certificate to be genuine. A copy of the document is reprinted below.

The whereabouts of Tush Limpole is as yet unknown.


Certificate of Birth

Issued this Fourth Day in the Month of August

In the Year One Thousand Nineteen Hundred and Sixty One

Nairobi, Kenya

 

Name of Child: Barack Hussein Obama

Name of Father: Barack Obama, Sr.

Name of Mother: White Lady

Sworn to me this Fourth Day of August One Thousand Nineteen Hundred and Sixty One.


Kareema Moustafa

Recorder of Births


Updates will follow as they become available.

From the UPW newsroom: Printing tastelessly trashy news across the planet



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