TUSH FOUND IN AFRICA

Tush Limpole has been found in Africa.

Search Party locates Tush in central Kenya.

File:Henri Rousseau - Jungle with Lion.jpg

Huge crowds awaiting the emergence from the jungle of right wing radio talk show host Tush Limpole. Limpole claims to have found the authentic birth certificate of Barack Obama.

From the UPW Newswire

A search party sent into the tribal region of Kenya reports that it has located Tush Limpole.

Limpole was traveling with a female companion and a caravan of Kenyans to a region occupied by the Boowambie tribe, an indigenous group that has lived in the area for a thousand years.

The chief of the Boowambie is said to have contacted Tush and claimed that he was in possession of the original birth certificate of Barack Obama.

The chief claimed that Obama was born of a tribal midwife and that his birth was registered in Nairobi, the capital of Kenya.

The Limpole search party is now on its way back to the capital and according to communications from the leader of the group, it should arrive in Nairobi within the next few minutes.

Tush was found safe and in good health. He claimed he was delayed due to extended negotiations with the chief. After receiving $250,000 in exchange for the document, the chief insisted on an additional $50,000 to pay two experts to examine and authenticate the birth certificate. Both experts confirmed that the certificate was authentic.

UPW has obtained a photocopy of the certificate which was transmitted electronically from a device in the possession of the search party.

A copy of the certificate is reprinted below.

A reporter from UPW noted discrepancies between the document he just received and one that was published several days ago.

In a brief conversation with Limpole, who is only minutes from the capital, the right wing radio talk show host claimed the document he now has in his possession is the genuine birth certificate.

Also speaking with reporters via radio communications was the Lady Margarita Dushanbe, the eighteen year old heiress to the Dushanbe family fortune.

Lady Dushanbe declared that she was so proud of her little Tushie that words failed her. The truth, she continued, has finally been revealed.


 

Certificate of Birth

Issued this Fourth Day of April One Thousand Nineteen Hundred and Sixty by the Office of the Recorder of Births

Nairobi, Kenya

Name of Child:  Barack Hussein Obama

Name of Father:  Barack Obama, Sr.

Name of Mother:  White Lady

Sworn before me this Fourth Day of April One Thousand Nineteen Hundred and Sixty:


Abdul Kareema Moustafa

Recorder of Births

Nairobi, Kenya

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