Archive for April 19th, 2011

April 19, 2011

PUTZIE WINNER ANNOUNCED

Nobella Prize Committee Awards Putzie to Democratic Senator.

File:Mark Warner during the Commissioning Ceremony for the VIRGINIA (SSN 774).jpg

Sen. Mark Warner of Virginia, most recent winner of the Putzie and member of the Senate’s infamous “gang of six”, forgot to comb his hair. Nice tie though.

Sen. Mark Warner, the extreme right wing Democratic centrist, has been tagged the winner of the Most Valuable Putz Award,

Today marks the first time Warner has been awarded the prize and he earned it by showing surpassing persistence and fortitude in pursuit of the destruction of Social Security despite overwhelming evidence that completely invalidates his position on the issue. Warner brings to his case to reduce Social Security benefits and thereby open the floodgates to revamping the program into an unrecognizable form – a bucket load of misinformation and inaccuracies that unveil a total misunderstanding and profound lack of knowledge of the subject.

Warner bases his case on the stat that there are now only three working individuals to support each retiree. In just a few years, he states, there will be only two to support each retired person whereas in 1950 the ratio was 16:1.

And there he stops. If he had exhibited enough smarts to continue the comparison he would have realized that in 1955 the ration declined even further to 8:1. And by 1975 it was approximately where it is today. That’s because as more people retire there are fewer people working. Hmmm. A no brainer.

Another statistic that the Senator is either ignorant of or chooses to ignore to close his argument is that in 1940 the ratio was 149:1. Nobody in his right mind would ever have believed that such a ratio would be sustained and the decline was built into the SS plan.

Fortunately, for Senator Warner, you don’t have to be in your right mind to win the Putzie.

So the Nobella Committee sends its unanimous congratulations to the Senator from Virginia.

Winners of the MVP award receive a statuette named the Pubar engraved with the words “putzed up beyond all reason.” Known as the Putzie for short the statuette is made of rusted metal stolen from an auto junk yard. The Putzie is given while supplies last and unfortunately for the senator supplies just ran out.

From the UPW Newsroom: Surpassing the Mainstream Media in reporting worthlessly useless news worldwide.

April 19, 2011

WNN SUNDAY SHOW FOLLIES

UPW Reporter Appears On Network Show.

Transcribes Q&A for Followers.

File:US Navy 090905-N-3165S-631 The Royal Navy fleet auxiliary ship Lyme Bay (L 3007) leads a formation of ships.jpg

Bullitt Industries furmishes munitions to all three services.

UPW National Reporter Marcy Popindick appeared on WNN’s Sunday talk show and was rudely interrupted by host Biff Bluster after she asked pointed questions which the guest refused to answer.

Facing the nation this week to discuss the state of the union was William D. Bullitt who made his first appearance on WNN’s weekly news roundup File A Report Today. The show stars the network’s top news entertainer and multimillionaire Biff Bluster.

This week’s guest is Assistant Second Secretary of Defense for Munitions. He agreed to meet the press and to answer questions posed to him by the host, Ms. Popindick and WNN economic analyst and multimillionaire Aly Shady.

Mr. Bullitt, who is himself a multimillionaire, is heir to the Bullitt family munitions and investment fund fortunes.

Ms. Popindick asked the Assistant Second Secretary for Munitions if his position represented a conflict of interest considering his family was heavily invested in the munitions industry and he and his family stood to profit enormously from decisions he might make regarding the procurement of all types of ammunition for the three branches of the Armed Forces.

Absolutely not. In no way does any decision I make regarding procurement represent a conflict of interest.

Ms. Popindick followded up with another question: Does the fact that eighty per cent of all contracts for bullets, bombs, rockets and cannon shells were awarded to Bullitt family businesses give an appearance of wrong doing?

Mr. Bullitt replied that he was not influenced in any way by family investments. That, he said, would be unethical.

Mr. Bluster than thanked the Assistant Second Secretary for his generous answer and moved on to another topic.

From Mr. Shady: Your family is reported to be heavily invested in other facets of defense logistics such as transportation, packaged foods, meals and fuel supply. If you felt a conflict of interest arose in any decision would you be inclined to recuse yourself?

Mr. Bullitt replied that if he felt there was a conflict of interest he would certainly recuse himself. But he insisted that there was no conflict.

Mr. Bluster interrupted with: Let’s move on to another subject.

You recently proposed a voucher system for veterans’ medical benefits to help them buy private health insurance. Would a veteran going into combat be able to obtain private health insurance? Ms. Popindick asked the guest.

We believe that in a free market a veteran going into combat would indeed be able to obtain adequate medical coverage. Competition in a private market is the answer to the problem of exploding medical expenses now born by the government.

It is my understanding that your family is also heavily invested in the profit health insurance industry. Does your position on privatizing veterans health care represent yet another conflict of interest?

Absolutely not, he replied.

Mr. Bluster suggested they move on to another topic.

A life insurance company owned by your family refused to pay the benefits owed by the policies your company issued to the families of fallen servicemen and women. The policies contained a fine print clause that the insurance company was entitled to invest the proceeds from the policy and families of deceased were denied the benefit. It that ethical?

We try to give grieving families of our brave fallen heroes every opportunity to invest in the American dream. That is our only purpose.

Mr. Bluster then ended the interview by thanking the Assistant Second Secretary for appearing on WNN’s show – the show that gives people in the news an opportunity to File A Report Today before the entire nation.

From the UPW Newsroom: Surpassing the Mainstream Media in reporting worthlessly useless news worldwide.