Committee Announces MVP Award

Pasta Fagiola, Italy

The Nobella Prize Committee announced the latest winners of its MVP award.

Glossy color postcard of Wall Street, New York...

Nice old timey picture of the Street where crime is rampant. But not street crime. White collar crime. Image via Wikipedia

The Committee gave its Most Valuable Putz prize to honor Wall Street bankers and investors who scammed millions of Americans by scarfing up untold numbers of subprime mortgages and then bundling them in to bonds called Collateralized Debt Obligations. In a twist of pure financial genius these bankers then sold the worthless bonds to unsuspecting investors many of whom were local school boards and county and state governments who bought into the scam.

The investors lost billions of dollars, destroying numerous pension funds in the process. However, the banking firms earned record profits while managing to wrest trillions of dollars in welfare payments from the taxpayer and the Fed.

The bankers of course contributed millions of dollars in protection money to the DC government and sure got their money’s worth in the deal.

A slight hitch occurred when the real estate bubble caused by these unsavory practices burst. Nevertheless the bankers made out like bandits. And nobody cares about pensions for a bunch of working slobs anymore anyway.

Congrats Wall Street bankers. You have earned your Putzie.

Winners of the MVP award receive a statuette named the PUBAR engraved with the words “Putzed up beyond all reason.” Known as the Putzie the statuette is made of rusted metal stolen from an auto junk yard. The Putzie is given while supplies last and unfortunately for the current winners supplies just ran out.

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