In a magnificent display of seasonal bipartisanship, Sen. Mike Crappo (R – ID ) got drunk. Getting plastered is about the only bipartisan activity that remains in that once laudable legislative body we refer to as The Senate.
Teetotaler (sorta) Mike Crapo (R-WY).
According to Unreliable Press Worldwide Most Honorable Senior Correspondent Marcy Popindick, Sen. Max Baucus (D-MT) is preparing legislation requiring senators to appear on the floor intoxicated at least twice a week while votes are being held.
The effort by Baucus is said to be a means of increasing bipartisanship in the upper chamber.
Republicans aren’t the only demons in the Senate. Pictured is the Honorable Max Baucus (D-MT) at one of his Senate office parties..
Since many are drunk more than twice a week, the measure is garnering widespread agreement among senators.
However, a small group of Democrats is withholding support. According to an exclusive received from a highly placed anonymous source, Ms. Popindick reports that the wavering senators believe Republican obstruction will continue even when they are hammered.
What do Christians do on Christmas?A turkey in the oven roasting Guests arrive whom we are hosting Pour the drinks for holiday toasting Then off for skiing and downhill coasting. . Open gifts with pretty wrappings Save the bows for next years trappings From gifts the kids shred pretty paper Only once a year this noisome caper. . Some may actually go to church After leaving religion in the lurch For all the year’s days previous Hypocrisy revealed so devious . What do Christians do on Christmas Invoke a god whose word they dismiss Till next year when they wait in lines Fight crowds and traffic for bargain finds.
Here are a few things Christians can do every day of the year. Who needs Christmas? And you don’t have to be Christian.
.A fellow was sipping some port For a holiday treat of a sort He finished with disdain Said this is insane To the scotch and soda he’d resort. . A woman was sipping some port So much did her actions distort She arrived at a party Kissed the fellows too hearty And in bed she went down like a real good sport.
Great stuff. But it sneaks up on you.
President Barack Obama and House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi are reportedly preparing a cookbook filled with recipes that offer cat food as the main ingredient.
The book will be entitled Feline Cuisine: 365 Ways To Prepare Dry Cat Food.
The joint effort will include daily menus that seniors can follow in order to savor the tempting treats for an entire day.
For the elderly who can no longer afford to buy ground coffee, one item describes how to prepare a tasty substitute from dandelion leaves seniors can pick in their back yards.
The book will also include instructions on how to steal powdered milk and sugar from the grocery store.
The president and Ms. Pelosi are said to be excited about the publication of their joint writing effort.
I can’t find a single media source – blog, TV station or newspaper – that reported the world did not end on Dec. 21. Therefore it must have ended.
If the corporate media omits reporting crucial information, chances are it’s extremely important for the economic well being of the nation. So what could be more important than the end of the world?
What does it take to convince people that we aren’t here anymore!
Paul Krugman has something to say about prophets of doom in his New York Times column. Alan Greenspan, the failed former Federal Reserve chairman, for example, prophesied in 2009 impending economic doom if large budget deficits continued.
As we know, the impending doom never impended and the Alan later went on to say that it was regrettable that his doom didn’t impend on the schedule he predicted it would because it “fostered a sense of complacency.”
Alan Greenspan on one of his bad days. We have since learned that he had many such days. But the joke’s on us.
The Alan, by the way, played a major role in the destruction of the economy and decimation of the middle class with his loose Fed policies and his muscle constricting explanations about why it would never happen. He was also incompre-hensively oblivious to the multi-trillion dollar housing bubble that burst shortly after he left Follyland for good.
Well, maybe not for good after all. Alan is now a prime player in billionaire Peter Peterson’s Fix The Debt Coalition. That’s Peterson’s cut, cut and cut some more everything in the economy that’s crucial to the well-being of working people.
Anyway, His Lordship the Alan, the chief architect of the debt, is now lecturing us on how to fix his boondoggle before we all come to an unhappy economic demise. Follyland just can’t get any follier than that. Fa la la la la la la la la.
And then there’s right wing aristocrat Erskine Bowles, inveterate Social Security cutter and potential Obama Treasury secretary. Another Follyland fiscal doomsayer, His Lordship the Erskine confidently predicted that the empire would decline and fall with two years if we didn’t get our fiscal house in the order he ordered. Actually, the Erskine began predicting these predictions about three years ago.
Oh, well. Just because in didn’t happen doesn’t mean it won’t. Mayan doomsayers take heart!
You can read Krugman’s column in The New York Times twice a week, Mondays and Fridays. Don’t miss it.
The worst Democratic presidents in history:
Bill Clinton – his zipper malfunctions aside, he must answer for NAFTA and deregulation.
Barack Obama – will probably become the worst before he’s done. His policies could well open the floodgates to vast changes in the social safety net. Keep in mind he’s not finished negotiating and that’s a frightening prospect.
James Buchanan – history’s worst before Clinton and Obama. He dawdled while the nation teetered on the precipice of a war between the states. It went over shortly after Buchanan left office.
Lyndon Johnson – New Deal warrior hoisted on the Vietnam petard of his own making.
Jimmy Carter – decent man but a casualty of circumstances he never seemed able to manage. And evidence is mounting that he was the victim of treasonable acts by Ronald Reagan and George H. W. Bush involving trading weapons to Iran in exchange for detaining American embassy prisoners until after the 1980 election.
Woodrow Wilson – a dreamer who failed at every turn to realize his vision for world peace. Also, a Southern racist.
There are sharp distinctions between liberals and Democrats. Some Democrats are liberals; some are right wing conservatives, particularly on economic issues.
All liberals are liberal.
Republicans hold a veto over all actions in the Senate. It’s called the filibuster but it’s a veto power unparalleled in the history of that pathetic legislative body.
Republicans think they’re all quite nerdy.
They’re not they just play extremely dirty.
Projecting their far right wing wiles.
Covering dark deeds with cynical smiles.
In the cloakrooms they all cluster
To plan their next filibuster.
The nation’s progress they willfully deny
The will of the people with joy they defy.
We’re sinking into the GOP mire
So tax cuts all must soon expire.
The recklessness of their spending
Barack Obama will soon be ending.
He must only hold their toes to the fire.