Archive for January, 2014

January 26, 2014

The DC Folly Trolley – 01/26/14

Papal Missive Misfires.

According to the latest reports emanating from the Vatican resort Castel Gandolfo, an ecclesiastical letter issued by Pope Francis in which he declares that “all religions are created equal”, is not a forgery as previously believed.

st peter's

St. Peter’s Square, Vatican City, where thousands often gather to receive the blessing of the Pope. (Photo courtesy Staselnik).

In the letter, the Pontiff also stated that the story of Adam and Eve is a myth and the idea of Hell a metaphor.

The words of Francis have been doubted by many Catholics. However, according to a papal nuncio attending the conference of Church hierarchy at which the letter was read, the statement is authentic. Also accurate are numerous reports of the document from various news sources despite errant references to a Third Vatican Council.

Criticism from Catholic groups, including many wealthy donors, has quickly reached an unexpected crescendo. Many devout adherents of the faith are demanding that the Pope retract his words.

Reports are now filtering through to numerous news organizations from an anonymous source believed to be affiliated with L’Observatore Romano, the Vatican equivalent of the NSA, that once the Pope realized the inflammatory nature of his statement and read the accompanying denunciations it had elicited, he concluded that his position as Vicar of Christ had been compromised and he promptly excommunicated himself.

Cardinals throughout the world are at this very moment being called into an emergency conclave to elect a new pope.

In a peroration to the weeping faithful slowly gathering in St. Peter’s Square, Francis ended his short resignation speech with the words: “La dolce vita e finita.”

http://www.naijaurban.com/no-hell-fire-adam-eve-not-real-pope-francis-exposes/

***

Committee Announces Award.

breaking

Pasta Fagioli, Italy. Jan. 25, 2014.

The Nobella Prize Committee announced from its hideout in Pasta Fagioli, Italy that it had awarded it latest MVP Prize to former Arkansas Governor Mike Huckabbee for his beliefs that Democrats are “telling women they cannot control their libido.”

In a speech during lunch before a Republican Convention, Huckabbeee claimed that Democrats had become a sugar daddy to women who gained contraceptive prescription coverage through Obamacare.

huckabee

The road to the White House is filled with bumps. Huckabee adds a few of his own in a speech before a gathering of influential Republicans.

Democrats, he said, want women to think they’re helpless unless Uncle Sugar provided free birth control because they can’t control their libido without government help.

A member for the committee, who spoke under conditions of anonymity, said he had no problem with women whose libidos were out of control, he just regrets he never met one.

Anyways, for his libidinous statement, Mike Huckabebee was awarded the Most Valuable Putz Prize.

.

Winners of The Most Valuable Putz Award receive a certificate acknowledging the award as well as a forged autographed copy of a photo of Don Alberto Vito Nobella, the originator of the prize.

These exceptional individuals also receive a statuette named the Pubar which is engraved with the words “Putzed up beyond all reason.” Known as the Putzie, the coveted statuette is sculpted of rusted metal stolen from an auto junk yard.

The Putzie is given while supplies last and unfortunately for the current winner supplies just ran out.

***

Conservative Defends MVP Award.

Conservative CNN Crossfire co-host S.E Cupp claimed to be shocked by the reaction to former Arkansas Gov. Mike Huckabee’s statement declaring that Democrats authorized free birth control prescriptions through Obamacare because women can’t control their libidos.

Referring to criticism of the former governor, Cupp said she had never seen “a lazier, more intellectually dishonest analysis..” Huckabee, she continued, was referring to an attitude on the part of Democrats and not to his own beliefs, an interpretation which many pundits ascribed to the remarks.

By nature of her defense of his luncheon speech, Cupp would most certainly agree that Huckabee is a deserving winner of the Nobella MVP award.

***

Obama Gains Among Fundie Christians.

President Barack Obama has been improving his position among fundamentalist Christians.

Yesterday he was the anti-Christ; today he’s merely paving the way for the devilish dervish. For Christians in the know, that change in position represents a huge gain for the president among the Fundies.

Robert Jeffress, fundamentalist pastor of an 11,000 member Baptist church, appeared on Bill O’Reilly’s reality show The O’reilly Factor to sell his new book, Perfect Ending. In which he writes that through implementation of Obama’s policies, people are being conditioned to accept governmental overreach, a condition necessary for the coming of a global world leader, that is, the anti-Christ.

antichrist

Lucky for Obama he’s no longer considered to be the guy in the painting. (Satan as the anti-Christ by an unknown artist).

Jeffress based his conclusions on the Affordable Care Act and the president’s embrace of abortion and related these policies to the coming of the Apocalypse predicted in the Book of Daniel and Revelation.

Well, the end of the world may lie somewhere in the not too distant future. But the Apocalypse probably has more to do with global warming than biblical forecasts.

In either case, Obama must be greatly relieved that he won’t be the doer of that evil deed.

***

New Logo For Bayer.

In keeping with a statement by company CEO Marijn Dekkers that Bayer produces drugs only for those who can pay up, the pharmaceutical giant introduced a new logo.

The new logo was designed by an advertising firm in New York at a cost of $7,000,000.00.

According to a spokesperson, the company must limit distribution to wealthy nations in order to earn the huge profits on its investments demanded by stockholders. Consisting largely of the !%, investors insist on perpetually increasing annual dividends or they’ll threaten to take their money elsewhere.

The spokesperson continued that the company’s hands are tied in this matter even though it means signing the death warrants of tens of thousands of victims of a deadly form of cancer.

Bayer is charging nearly $70,000.00 a year for the medication which is used to treat liver and kidney malignancies.

 skull

The attitude of pharmaceutical giants like Bayer proves once again that the 1% put profit above human life and dignity.

A court in India recently granted a license to produce a generic form of the drug that will cost about $180.00.

Bayer intends to fight the decision to the death – of tens of thousands of helpless victims.

http://thinkprogress.org/health/2014/01/26/3205861/pharmaceutical-ceo-cancer-drug-westerners-afford/

***

A Bright Star.

Sen. Elizabeth Warren, (D-MA), a bright star in an otherwise dim constellation of Democratic hopefuls for the party’s presidential nomination, spoke to a gathering in St. Peter’s Church in Manhattan recently.

warren

She was joined by New York State Attorney General Eric Schneiderman who spoke at length about the need for campaign finance reform.

Schneiderman has also been at odds with right wing New York Governor Andrew Cuomo, a self-proclaimed Democrat, over how to divide $613 million in fines paid by JPMorgan Chase in restitution for its mortgage derivatives caper.

Income inequality was also addressed by the speakers which did not include the conservative governor who, it was noted, did not mention in his State of the State report the huge income disparity that has beset the nation’s economy for decades.

cuomo

Right wing NY Democratic Governor Andrew Cuomo got his nose bent out of shape by a gathering of rising liberals at St. Peter’s Church in NYC. The group of speakers, by largely remaining silent on the governor’s policies, obliquely criticized his agenda.

Cuomo is a pillar of the right wing establishment of the Democratic Party whose agenda includes lowering taxes for the wealthy and austerity inducing balanced budgets.

http://readersupportednews.org/opinion2/277-75/21700-elizabeth-warren-got-political-in-new-york-city-last-night

***

Second Thoughts.

gwb c

January 21, 2014

The DC Folly Trolley – 01/19/14

A Really Bad Week.

Ever lose two court decisions in one week. Well, if you have, you are no longer alone.

Right wing Republican governments in the United States just accomplished that dubious distinction.

A Federal judge declared unconstitutional a NC law requiring women seeking an abortion to undergo an ultrasound exam.

In its opinion, the Court ruled that promoting an “ideological message” through a medical procedure violated a woman’s rights.

Therefore, a woman could not be forced by the North Carolina government to view an ultrasound image nor could it force a provider to describe the features nor offer a chance to listen to the heartbeat.

mccrory

Gov. Pat McCrory and his comrades in the antideluvian NC legislature took one on he chin.

.

Not to be outdone by the Tar Heelers, right wing Pennsylvania Gov. Tom Corbett and his legislative troglodytes took a hit in state court when a judge ruled a restrictive voter ID law unconstitutional.

The intent of the law, and all similar laws passed by Republican governors in several other states, is to disenfranchise Democratic voters. Enough said.

 

***

O, O, O Obama.

Like Obama do you? Maybe even love him? Well, if so, it may be because you’re a tribal Democrat and would vote for Satan if he declared himself a member of that once great party.

Or maybe you don’t like Obama, but voted for him anyway because there was no way you could vote for the two schmucks who ran against him.

Or maybe you voted for him because on the campaign trail in 2008 he lied like a tart in confession in speech after speech and you fell for it.

Well, regardless of the reason for your vote, you’ve been hornswoggled by the greatest snake oil salesman in recent history.

How? Here’s how.

First we had Obamacare, corporate control of health insurance, ACA. The Affordable Care Act entrenches corporate involvement in the health care industry for generations. ACA was the wrong way and Obama charged down that path when he reneged on the public option after extolling it in numerous speeches.

Next we’ll get Obamatrade, corporate control of trade, TPP. This bogus trade agreement will allow corporations to overturn national laws by a mere appeal to a tribunal rigged to abide by corporate will.

Soon we’ll have Obamanet, corporate control of the Internet. Obama’s FCC sided squarely with the telecommunications industry when it voted to classify telecoms as information providers rather than a service. That decision removed Internet control from the FCC and now allows telecoms the freedom to charge for net use as they see fit.

Reclassifying broadband access as a service should have been done at the very beginning of the Obama regime. Instead, his commissioners steadfastly defended te notion that telecoms were information sources. They could hardly do otherwise in an Obama administration. To classify as a service would have removed the profit motive from the telecom equation. And how would that play on Wall Street!

Were Obama’s FCC commissioners incompetent? Or were they complicit?

Complicit, no doubt.

Now that’s the change we should have believed in regardless of what the great smoke blowing machine told us during the 2008 campaign.

***

Dethinking Inequality.

If anybody can dethink, it’s David Brooks, columnist for the New York Times.

First, let us describe “dethinking,” for it is what Brooks does best.

It’s knowing that what you think is wrong, but being forced to prove it correct by resorting to a variety of creative devices to demonstrate from a conservative perspective that what is patently wrong is really right.

So Brooks, in his most recent column, latched on to the subject of inequality and using right wing logic (oxymoron alert) managed to dethink the issue.

No, no, no, he seems to be saying. We’ve got it all wrong. It’s not inequality that causing an abrupt increase in poverty. It’s the “interrelated social problems of the poor” that at the heart of the issue.

It’s a whole new take on the old right wing theme that poor people are the cause of poverty.

Here is another example of right wing dethinking: Blaming homeowners for being cheated by banks and mortgage originators; and blaming government for forcing banks to create bogus mortgages.

thinker

Some people think better upside down. Of course, the ideas come out that way as well. (The Thinker by Auguste Rodin, photo: Cham (Christian Amet).

So according to this nefarious form of dethinking, homeowners who were scammed into bogus mortgages were responsible for the housing crisis; and government must share the blame because it forced bankers to make exorbitant profits from the scheme. As always in conservative logic, the victims are guilty of corporate crime while the corporate criminals go free.

Oh, well. Some things never change except for the words used to describe tired, worn out ideas.

Read Robert Reich’s take on David Brooks. He does a far better job of hitting the nail on the head than I ever could.

***

Tiptoeing Through The Tulips.

Who might that be, you say? Why it’s Chris Christie, the nimble footed, jack-be-quick governor of the semi-great state of New Jersey. The gov, it seems, has stuck a teensy weensy toe ever so delicately into another great big bowl of jam.

And it has nothing to do with bridgegate. This time yet another member of his administration has been accused by the Mayor of Hoboken (yes, Virginia, there really is a town called Hoboken), one Dawn Zimmer of attempting to influence the selection of a contractor to do work in, oh well, Hoboken or else….

Or else the governor would withhold Federal relief funds intended to repair the damage done by Storm Sandy.

christie kin

Christie and Dawn Zimmer.

The governor’s lieutenant governor, that would be Kim Guagagno, threatened to withhold the Federal freebie if Zimmer refused to select the governor’s favorite contractor, The Rockefeller Group,to do some construction work in Hoboken.

Nothing will ever come of this affair since it’s really a matter of she said, she said. But the episode makes for some juicy newsy gossip.

As for me, I don’t see what all the fuss is about. So the governor maybe put in a good word for a contractor with connections. I mean, what are friends for?

And besides, it’s the American way.

***

Just One More Story About a GOP Gov. Just One.

This one is about a governor whose about to be carried back to ole Virginny to face Federal corruption charges.

Seems former Virginia Governor Bob McDonnell some gifts from a supporter with connections in the gov’s government, ya know, little things like a Rolex watch for himself and designer gowns for his wife. And a few other things like a fifty grand loan, shopping sprees worth as much as $15,000, sets of golf clubs, hot tubs and cash for his two daughters’ wedding.

All of that in exchange for putting in a good word with the Virginia Department of Health about his chum’s dietary supplement which the FDA said was worthless.

 bob m

Just tryin’ ta hep a friend. What’s wrong with that!!!  So sayeth the former gov. of Virginia.

So? Seems like a good deal to me. But not to Federal prosecutors who are bringing the charges against the former gov. who says he innocent.  What else???

All things considered, 2014 is shaping up to be a bad year for Republican governors. And it’s still January.

January 12, 2014

The DC Folly Trolley – 01/12/14

So We Didn’t Know It Before???

Okay, so maybe some people ignored it, turned a blind, cut the guy some slack. But now it’s official. New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie is a bullshitter. Not an ordinary bullshitter, mind you. But a monumental bullshitter.

The NJ gov., as you may have heard by now, blamed the traffic jams that occurred on the George Washington Bridge shortly before Election Day on staffers who orchestrated the backup with the connivance Christie supporters at the Port Authority.

Well, the gov took the blame, said he was the honcho in charge of stuff in the Garden State and looked for all the world his meek and humble self.   But then did a turnabout, said he was lied to by staff members who hatched the diabolical plot and then fired those responsible for the dirty deed.

That’s the bullshit part.

It now appears that Christie’s Chief Legal Council and longtime associate Charles McKenna not only knew about the traffic jam conspiracy but actually congratulated conspirators on their successful efforts. “Charlie said you did GREAT” reads a smoking email.

Here’s yet another twist unraveling. Christie said he appointed McKenna to investigate the matter and report back to him with the names of the evildoers.

We shouldn’t jump to conclusions of course. But, what the hell, let’s jump. It’s believable that McKenna could have reported all the names of those invovled in the caper save one – his own. But it’s more likely that Christie knew what was going down in the first place and the whole investigation thing is a cover up.

The Mother Jones take on the most recent revelations is, well, revealing:

http://www.motherjones.com/mojo/2014/01/chris-christie-fort-lee-charlie-mckenna-text-message

christe lasagne

Christie, G. W. Bush and a guy with a real job, Medal of Honer winner Sgt. First Class Leroy Petry.  (Orig: The U.S. Army).

Here’s the real story – as told by a disenchanted Christie staffer to Unreliable Press Worldwide’s Super Senior New Jersey Public Affairs Correspondent Marcy Popindick. And don’t repeat this to a soul ’cause it’s a secret.

It seems the portly governor enjoyed taking casual strolls on the George Washington Bridge, long about rush hour. And while doing so, he managed to block two lanes of traffic – for days.

So far, very believable.

It wasn’t a revenge thing, mind you, implemented just because some Democratic mayor from the town of Fort Lee, which just happens to merge into the GWB, refused to give his support to a Repub governor during the recent election cycle.

No, the governor just like to skip along the bridge during the busiest hour of the day.

And the massive traffic tie ups caused by the gov’s hippity hoppiting down the lanes were merely a by-product of the strolls he took such a liking to.

Now for the rest of the story. Also a by-product of the gov’s fancy was the observation by numerous commuters that the bridge seemed slightly bent out of shape.

When engineers were alerted to a potentially dangerous condition, they immediately began inspecting the bridge for structural damage. They became gravely concerned when they discovered a distinct rightward tilt of the upper tier of the two level span.

It seems the NJ honcho liked to hippity hop in only one direction and that habit caused the bridge to lean to the right.

Engineers were reportedly busy developing a plan to correct the pronounced rightward shift.

Now that’s a story you can believe. Certainly better than the bullshit Christie was throwing around at his news conference.

Here’s the one thing you can count on about the gov’s jam: You’ll never hear the truth from him.

chris gwb

New Yorker’s Chris Christie Cover Is Perfect

***

Eliminate Crime Forever.

One way to eliminate criminal behavior on the part of bankers is deregulate the banks. Now that we’ve deregulated the banks we can all see the benefits, no laws, no crimes.

Now why didn’t we think of that before. It’s an idea that opens whole vistas of possibilities.

Why, we can return to the days of old, to very beginnings of civilization and learn how crime can be reduced and even eliminated entirely simply by doing away with a few laws.

But let’s not go back that far. Let’s start with the pirates. No, not the Wall Street bankers. I mean the Blackbeard kind.

pirate

(Credit: mwanasimba from La Réunion).

Society passed all kinds of laws trying to prevent those guys with the serious dental problems from robbing and killing on the high seas.

Why?

Nobody really cared except a few rich people who needed laws to make the oceans safe for commerce. And with the laws came the need to track down and jail the one eyed miscreants.

Now look at what happens next. If you gotta track ’em down, you gotta have a navy. And that’s means spending billions of dollars. And recruiting men who don’t want to be sailors to become sailors. That means something called impressment – on land and on the seas. And that’s really bad ’cause it can get folks riled up and lead to war and just one of those wing dings causes more destruction and killing than the pirates ever did since the invention of boats.

So if the laws against piracy were eliminated there would be no pirates and while there still would be recruiting, there would be no impressment and folks wouldn’t get riled up and there would be no destruction and killing caused by massive uniformed gangs blowing each other up on a battlefield.

At least piracy wouldn’t be the cause.

Anyways, laws can be a very bad thing. Which is what the Wall Street bankers discovered when they paid government officials in Congress and the White House to deregulate banks, i.e., kill the laws.

Unfortunately for the pirates there was no Bill Clinton back in the day to sign off on piracy deregulation like he did for the banks.

And, unlike bankers, pirates were not politically savvy. They didn’t realize they could turn stolen booty into campaign payola. Like the bankers did.

So just because they couldn’t get government to overturn a few laws, pirates who were captured were summarily hanged.  (See photo above to understand the fate of pirates who were too honest to corrupt government officials).

Ironically, these bandits of the high seas had far greater entrepreneurial skills than any Wall Street CEO ever dreamed of. Let’s face it, it takes a lot more business acumen to be a pirate; not so much to be a banker.

.

There once was a pirate named Jamie.
Who practiced an art quite gamey.
He would rob and pillage
From city to village
And claim, “There’s no law so don’t blame me.”

***

God Screws Up.

If you think God is perfect and can’t make mistakes think again.

Well, He sent Louie Gohmert to Congress, didn’t he. And if that isn’t bad enough, He can’t remember why in God’s name he ever did that.

Not to worry, though God. Louie knows why.

You see, God, you inspired your loyal servant and with that solemn inspiration reverberating in his brain, Louie ran for office and won a seat in the House of Representatives where he intends to fulfill the promise of your Son to keep a bunch of damn single moms from getting any more welfare checks.

You don’t remember that? How could you forget?

You sent Louie to that God forsaken place to be the perfect example of “compassionate conservatism.” And he just gave what amounts to an historic Sermon on the Hill. No, not the mount. The Hill, Capitol Hill.

louie

Heeeeeeere’s Louie. 

Your servant – that’s Louie – was inspired by You to get into politics and he got elected, and on his first try no less. So You must have greased the way for him and now he’s ever so grateful and giving thanks by demeaning what former President Lyndon Johnson did 50 years ago when he declared a War on Poverty.

The former president’s program lifted millions of people out of poverty through education, job training and living assistance. The War was a great success as far as it went. If it failed it was because later presidents failed the program and reduced the Great Society experiment to a state of stagnant “benign neglect.” Nevertheless, millions benefited from the effort and went on to enjoy successful middle class living standards.

But Your faithful servant believes that single moms and their kids would benefit more from inadequate housing, deficient education and going hungry than from a sustained government effort of assistance to uplift poor people.

Well, that’s Louie for ya.

***

Your Are About To Be TPP’d.

The magnificent Follyland Smoke Machine was at his best once again.

You perhaps heard about or maybe even read the transcript of the president’s speech on economic mobility and income inequality. No need to say he did a great job because he always does.

Of blowing smoke, that is. Just in case you were wondering where he stands here’s the scoop: He supports the former and decries the latter.

Yes, the president proclaimed in stentorian tones that Teddy Roosevelt fought for the eight hour workday and got. FDR fought for Social Security and got it. LBJ fought for Medicare and he got it.

So what is Barack Obama fighting for. Income inequality, what else!

two face

The two faces of Barack Obama.

The speech was typical Obama smoke and mirrors as in say one thing and do exactly the opposite.

For the president is fighting for the Trans Pacific Partnership, a so called “free trade” deal that has little to do with trade and a whole lot to do with corporate domination of the economies and legal structures of every nation that signs on to this perverted pact.

Remember NAFTA, the Clinton administration fiasco that cost the American middle class more than a million jobs and three million Mexican farmers and small businessmen their livelihoods while fattening the portfolios of the richest of the rich?

Well, Obama’s TPP promises to do even more for the fat cats who paid for his passage into the Oval Office. This trade deal that isn’t a trade deal will drive the final nail into the middle class coffin.

Let’s give just one ugly detail about this nefarious package. If a corporation believes that a law of any nation inhibits its ability to maximize profits, it can bring suit before a tribunal and challenge the law. If it wins the suit, a likely foregone conclusion, the law is overturned.

Well, guess what. Corporations in the United States are required by law to contribute to Social Security and unemployment compensation funds.

Talk about a sneak attack on the social safety net.

But it gets worse. Employee benefits, what remains of them, could easily vanish along with the minimum wage laws, many of which have yet to be adopted, and of course all hourly pay would be under attack as well. And this march back to the 19th century is being brought to you by none other than Barack Obama himself, the ultimate smoke blowing machine.

And it only gets worse. You see, the entire sordid affair is supposed to be a secret. You are not supposed to know about the back stabbing terms of the evil pact. The plan calls for the terms to be sprung upon you after the fact, a virtual fait accompli.  Save for a handful of leaks, the negotiations would be shrouded in an impenetrable cloud of secrecy.

Think it can’t get any worse?  Well, it just did.  The corporate communications giants will be permitted to take control of the Internet and monitor content in much the same way the NSA scans conversations and email traffic across the entire planet.  You won’t be able to voice a protest without your message being scanned.  And Facebook, Google, etc. will be tasked with the obligation to scour the web for undesirable content.

internet

The Internet, a thorn in the side of the 1%.

Obama has been sneaking around behind the backs of the American people in this manner for his entire term in office. (His voltefaccia on the public option is just one other example). I smell another sneak attack.

So much for the transparency president.

See below:  Bill Moyers, Yves Smith and Dean Baker on the TPP threat to democracy; Youtube short on Internet control; and the transcript of the presidents speech on inequality.

Bill Moyers: Trans-Pacific trade pact is death for democracy

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p3KlrfjcjV4

http://www.whitehouse.gov/the-press-office/2013/12/04/remarks-president-economic-mobility

.

And here’s the latest news for this bummer of a deal for working people in the Western nations whose leaders are behind the plot to finally kill off the middle class.

Enemy of the people Thomas Donohue of the U.S. Chamber of Commerce said: “We are within striking distance of concluding an agreement….”

The rest of his statement is pure corporate bullshit. See the link for the bullshit.

TPP deal in ‘striking distance’: Donohue | The Japan Times

***

Wonders Never Cease.

Here’s what we’ve all been waiting for. Obama cheerleader and House Minority Honcho Nancy Pelosi said: “We want transparency.”

The representative who should have left her heart high on a hill in San Francisco, was referring to President Obama’s Trans Pacific Partnership.

The Bogus Trade Agreement is a secret and the entire Congress and you and me and just about everybody else who isn’t a corporate flack have been kept in the dark about the terms.  Whatever has been revealed about the shrouded deal squeezed through the barriers on the lips of a leaker.  (Thanks yet again Wikileaks).

So Nancy’s upset ’cause Obama is keeping secrets from her.  She warned the president that her caucus will not support his TPP and is prepared to slap Obama with a huge political embarrassment if he doesn’t start whispering in her ear.

Chris Van Hollen (D-MD), echoing Pelosi’s words, remarked: “There is inadequate engagement on the substance” of the bogus pact.

Well, here’s the real story. The Dems aren’t angered by the prospect that the TPP will cause further rot to the working class of developed countries.

Nope. They’re pissed off because el presidente snubbed them and they’re embarrassed by his actions.

nancy2

Nancy Pelosi, after plastic surgery.

The president, of course, doesn’t need his hypocritical Dems anyways. With the exception of the votes of a handful of Senate comrades who he already has in his back pocket, he can muster enough Republican support to get the TPP fast tracked and then passed into law.

So to avoid an embarrassing situation all around, look for a White House staffer to sneak into the Capitol late one night and clue in the Democratic leadership about the evil agreement. Once Obama makes nice nice with his party’s Congressional honchos he will be able to count on their full support.

Did you ever doubt the outcome?

Why House Democrats Might Kill Obama’s Big Trade Deal

(Fat chance).

***

More Limerick Lunacy.

A fellow was warned in advance
But decided to still take a chance
He hit on a gal
In a seedy locale.
Sister Agnes looked at him askance.
.
A woman refused an advance
From a guy at a neighborhood dance.
That’d be the day
I ever will pay
Attention to a suave fancy pants.”
.
A gal got a tiny advance
From a boss who then took a chance.
If to my place you will come
I will pay a fine sum.
For a night of thrilling romance.”
.
The gal with the tiny advance.
Told her boss to shove his romance
The money is spent
So you can get bent.
And I have a new job in finance.”

Originally posted to:

http://www.madkane.com/humor_blog/

2014/01/05/limerick-outing-limerick-off-monday/

 

January 6, 2014

The DC Folly Trolley – 01/05/14

Putz Of The Year Named.

bulletin

breaking news

From the Unreliable Press Worldwide newsroom.

December 06, 2014, Pasta Fagioli, Italy.

The Nobella Prize Committee has just announced its Putz Of The Year award. The honor goes to Ken Langone, Home Depot co-founder and heavy contributor to Catholic causes.

Langone won for his criticism of Pope Francis I, whose statements warning of the dangers of unfettered capitalism, angered the former executive of the hardware store giant.

The angry Langone went straight to the top of the Catholic hierarchy in America when he complained publicly to Timothy Dolan, the cardinal in charge of the archdiocese of New York where St. Patrick’s Cathedral is located.

Dolan is in the midst of a campaign to raise $180 million for the restoration of St. Pat’s and Langone is head honcho of the drive.

Last week, Langone boldly threatened the Pope by declaring that he and other rich Catholics would withhold funds from Catholic charities if the Francis didn’t come around to seeing things Langone’s way.

For his part, Dolan meekly explained that the box store founder misunderstood what Francis meant when the Holy Father invoked the words of Jesus Christ, another founder of sorts whom Langone seems to have forgotten about.

The Committee also noted that Langone’s bid for the naming rights to the NYC church won that honor hands down and for the next ten years St. Pat’s will be known as Home Depot Cathedral.

HOME DEPOT 

And so for his fearless attempt at blackmailing Pope Francis and the entire Catholic church, Langone was named Putz Of The Year.

.

Winners of The Most Valuable Putz Award receive a certificate acknowledging the award as well as a forged autographed copy of a photo of Don Alberto Vito Nobella, the originator of the prize.

These exceptional individuals also receive a statuette named the Pubar which is engraved with the words “Putzed up beyond all reason.” Known as the Putzie, the coveted statuette is sculpted of rusted metal stolen from an auto junk yard.

The Putzie is given while supplies last and unfortunately for the current winner supplies just ran out.

From the UPW Newsroom reporting from Pasta Fagioli, Italy. Unreliable Press Worldwide: Surpassing the Mainstream Media in reporting worthlessly useless news the world over.

***

Bill Sticks Red Nose In.

Does It Belong? We’ll See.

Bill DeBlasio was sworn as mayor of New York by none other than former President Bill Clinton.

DeBlasio worked in the Clinton Housing Department under then secretary Andrew Cuomo.

The new mayor has called for a new direction for the city. He has outlined an unabashedly liberal approach to correcting the problem of surging inequality, a problem that has bedeviled the entire nation as well as NYC.

He seeks to adjust upward income redistribution by increasing taxes on the wealthiest New Yorkers by about three dollars a day and setting a $10.50 an hour minimum wage for workers on city financed projects.

Nice start.

However, during his swearing ceremony he surrounded himself with right wing Democrats. Bill Clinton, for example, signed off on policies that did as much as anyone to decimate the working class. And Cuomo, the consummate pol, has opposed tax increases on the wealthy, many of whom are his most generous payoff money pals.

It remains to be seen if DeBlasio is sincere about implementing a liberal agenda or, like President Obama, simply made pretty campaign speeches and when in office, does an Obama like turnabout.

Hillary was there too, cheering with the rest at the populism advocated by the new mayor.

Ironically, the former First Lady has already pronounced herself a “safe” presidential candidate for the 1% during highly paid appearances before Wall Street millionaires and conservative think tanks.

Are there real changes in the wind? Or are right wing Democrats just blowing smoke? “Triangulation” was the word of the day during the Clinton years. That is, tell them what they want to hear and then do what the money commands.

***

Get Ready For SS Cuts.

Both Bill Clinton and Barack Obama have supported reducing benefits for the working class by cutting Social Security and Medicare.

In fact, Obama has been out front and vocal about changing the COLA for SS to a “chained” CPI which is DC smoke talk for cuts.

Obama’s excuse, and one that many his supporters mirror, is that the Repubs are such stubborn meanies that the only way a Democratic president can get a budget passed or the debt ceiling increased is by succumbing to GOP demands for safety net reductions.

Excuses.  Excuses.  Excuses.

Since there’s no way to drum Barack Obama or Bill Clinton (or Hillary for that matter) out of the Democratic Party (although they should be for their renunciation of two pillars of the Party’s legacy)let’s hope Obama goes down to another hapless defeat on the safety net issue.

It is, however, unlikely that populist momentum can overturn payoff money control of leading Democrats.

Optimistic Thought for the New Year: The Looming Battle for Real Social Security Can Spawn a New Progressive Movement | The Smirking Chimp

***

Tireless Fighter For The Little Guy.

Despite the odds, Robert Reich has no “give up” in his soul when it comes to sticking up for working class people.

Rock a billy Bob tells it like it is, clink the link below.

robert reich

A working person’s best friend, the indefatigable Robert Reich.

(Photo: Policy Network).  

A New Year’s Message | Robert Reich

***

Obamacare Boondoggle.

Yogi says “It ain’t over till it’s over” as the Affordable Care Act makes a strong comeback.

Even with the momentum on its side, however,the act gets a failing grade in the area most vital to access to health care: COST.

Obamacare does little to address the rising costs patients must share when they need medical care.

An overnight stay in a hospital to treat a potentially fatal bee sting can cost around $12,000. While health insurance may cough up enough cash to pay for a large portion of the bill, with co-pays and deductibles, a patient could easily get stuck paying $4000 or $5000 thousand dollars of the total. And that’s after premiums for so-called “insurance” are paid and only for one night.  Stay for two nights and you’ll need an attorney.

Although the act relies heavily on competition to reduce health insurance costs, that goal is little more than wishful thinking for the moment.

bo

The ACA, most notably, does pick on Medicare to achieve cost reduction and does so by slashing payments providers, a feature that will save billions over a decade. It remains to be seen how well that overused device will work.  Other than that cut, Obamacare depends entirely on a rigged marketplace to control costs.

Another feature of the act is one that is supposed to encourage health care seekers to “shop around” for the best price. Ya know, like you do for TVs and stereos and cell phones and pick up trucks.

Yeah, right.

It’s becoming increasingly clear that a Medicare for All fix was the answer to the health care crisis in the first place. And, despite Obama excuse makers, the expansion of Medicare to everyone was doable given the reconciliation process in the Senate where only 51 votes was required for passage. It was the Obama White House that squashed that option.

Below is an article that exposes the myth of doctor and hospital price shopping.

http://mag.newsweek.com/2014/01/03/myth-health-cares-free-market.html

***

Biff. Bam. Boom.

No, not a speech balloon from a Batman comic strip. It’s the sound effects from a wife beating perpetrated by a GOP candidate for Senate from the snowy state of Maine.

colerick

Bennett, left and Susan Collins. (Orig. IIdar Sagdejev, Spedous).

One Erick Bennett claims after being convicted of wife beating that he was unjustly convicted of beating his wife.

The Maine Supreme Court decided that the “exclusion of irrelevant evidence” was insufficient grounds to overturn the conviction which was supported by ample evidence.

So Erick decided to challenge Sen. Susan Collins in the primary elections instead.

Well, whatdaya expect. He’s a Republican.

Here’s a statement from Bennett according to Addicting Info: “If I go to DC, I’m going to have that same integrity in doing what I say and saying what I do when it comes to protecting peoples rights as well as their pocketbooks.” Biff. Bam. Boom.

.

A fellow who’d just come to blows
Gave his wife a mean bloody nose.
He’s a terrible lout
A GOPer no doubt
Whose running for Senate in Maine snows.

Erick Bennett Brags That Hitting Wife Proves Guts To Be A Senator

***

More Birth Control Follies.

A nursing home for the elderly run by an order of Catholic nuns appealed to the Supreme Court to exempt it from the Obamacare mandate requiring non-religious institutions to provide contraceptive coverage for employees.

Associate Justice Sonia Sotomayor heard the appeal and issued a temporary restraining order. She will decide at a later date whether to bring the case before the full Court.

The Little Sisters for the Poor Home for the Aged claimed that they are insured by a church plan which is self-insured and under those circumstances are exempt from the Obamacare mandate.

Government lawyers argued the Sisters had no basis for the claim since they are already exempt under a 1974 law that predates the ACA and exempts religious institutions.

However, since the process of providing contraceptive coverage requires the Sisters to sign a document permitting such coverage, even though actual distribution of birth control products would not be required, the nuns claimed the signing of the document itself violated their religious protections.

Well, at least they’re not declaring a war over the issue. Not yet anyway.

.

In a related development, His Eminence Mangiapasta Cardinal Bacciagalupe, bishop of the Archdiocese of Pasta Fagioli, Italy announced that the Supreme Patriarch of the Church will declare all female Adherents of the Faith who continue to use contraception excommunicated as of the eleventh day of the first month in the year of Our Lord 2014.

The Order of Excommunication applies to all women of the faith including those who engage in sexual relations without benefit of matrimony.

As a member of the organization of Guardian of the Holy Faith, the cardinal stated “Better they should get pregnant and give birth out of wedlock than violate the Lord’s command to increase and multiply.”

In his statement, the Patriarch demanded that all hypocrisy over the use of contraception be brought to an end.

Cardinal Bacciagalupe pointed out, however, that many in the clergy are disappointed by Order since nearly all women of child bearing age who are members of the Church use contraception to prevent unwanted pregnancy, Should they be excommunicated, the membership of the Church would decline by at least one half and donations would plummet similarly.

At last report, the Patriarch was reconsidering his Order and may revise the date for implementation to the year of Our Lord 2214, giving women at least 200 years to comply.