Posts tagged ‘Nancy Pelosi’

May 19, 2014

The DC Folly Trolley – 05/18/14

Just Another Shoot ‘Em Up Repub.

A Utah state pol, a Repub of course, called for the return of the firing squad as a means of execution.

A Democrat who spoke under conditions of anonymity said he would support the measure only if calling for execution by firing squad was made a capital offense.

http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2014/05/17/utah-republican-calls-for-the-return-of-executions-by-firing-squad/

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Liberals” Hate Liberals.

Interviewing Glenn Greenwald, who is promoting his book Nowhere To Hide, Chris Hayes said that a lot of people, mostly liberals, watching his show All In With Chris Hayes, hate the author for his wide ranging criticisms of the Obama administration.

Portrait of Glenn Greenwald -creator of Unclai...

Portrait of Glenn Greenwald -creator of Unclaimed Territory blog and contributing writer at Salon.com (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Hayes, however, may be confusing liberals with Democrats.  For liberals, there is much to dislike about the policies of the president, not the least of which is its widespread spying on Americans and the deeply imbedded government secrecy it espouses.

In fact, many liberals are finally coming to grips with the president’s right wing conservatism.

dems burning

Right wing Dems: burning the house that FDR built.

For example, we have been assaulted with,

Obamacare – the obnoxiously complex and unnecessarily expensive health insurance program based on a right wing plan straight out of the Heritage Foundation.

Obamatrade – the soon to be TPP and TTIP trade agreements both of which are staunchly supported by Obama and which are designed to enhance corporate control of a global economy.

Obamabanks – the president became Rescuer in Chief of the banking industry by presiding over the growth of already too big to fail monstrosities and by refusing to prosecute the Wall Street thieves responsible for the economic implosion that began in 2007.

Obamanet – the president appointed a communication’s industry executive to the chairmanship of the FCC whose sole purpose in that position is the destruction of net neutrality.

Obamaed – the most recent nose thumb from the pres is the appointment of school privatizer and CEO of New Schools Venture Fund Ted Mitchell as under secretary of education for higher ed.

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Yes, there is much for liberals to loathe about Obama’s policies. Not only did the 2008 candidate pull off one of the greatest stings in political history by bamboozling us with his populist message. With unsurpassed hubris, he continues to throw populism in our faces while he acts in the opposite manner.

How can there be any doubt that President Obama is a right wing conservative whose policies run counter to the beliefs of true liberals.

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Perhaps the only persons who can support the president nowadays are tribalists, that is, Democrats who belong to one of the two political tribes in the US (the other tribe, of course, is the Republican party).

Tribalists support the policies of the leader of the party. In the case of Dems at the moment, the leader is the president.

In order to remain a loyal member of the tribe, a tribesman must stand behind the leader even if his policies run counter to the traditions of the tribe. And that is what Dems are currently doing, including such former liberal stalwarts as Nancy Pelosi.

Just read a few of the words spoken by right winger Bill Clinton, the worst president in the history of the Democratic party, at the ultra-conservative Peter G. Peterson fiscal summit in Washington DC and you’ll get a smattering of how far to the right the Dems have drifted.

Here’s a statement by Clinton about the guardians of the Democratic party’s liberal legacy as he told former Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner that you could slit Lloyd Blankfein’s throat and that would satisfy them (loyal Democrats) for about two days and then the blood lust would rise again.

Also in attendance at the annual Peterson propaganda event were Pelosi and Dem senator Patty Murray.

http://www.businessweek.com/articles/2014-05-13/bill-clinton-and-chris-christie-go-back-to-back-with-deficit-speeches

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And here is a statement by Clinton referring to the guardians of the Democratic party’s liberal legacy as he told former Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner:  that you could slit Lloyd Blankfein’s throat and that would satisfy them  for about two days and then the blood lust would rise again.
 

To paraphrase the statement of this worn out war horse:  You could hand them our Social Security on a silver platter and that would satisfy them for about two days.  Then the greed lust would rise again .

bill c

Time to put this tired old troublemaker out to pasture.

http://www.businessinsider.com/bill-clinton-joke-slashing-lloyd-blankfein-throat-2014-5

http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2014/05/17/chris-hayes-to-glenn-greenwald-you-have-a-talent-for-making-liberals-hate-you/

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Colonoscopy For Congressman.

Rep. Darrell Issa (R-CA) underwent a colonoscopy last week. According to leaked medical records, doctors found a large number of brain cells located just below the distal portion of the bowel.

dissa

We all knew he had a brain. Now we know where it is.

ass

The path to many a DC brain starts here.

(Darrell Issa, pictured above, is chairman of the Mickey Mouse Benghazi hearings.)

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Right Wing Gathering A Huge Success.

The right wing inspired Operation American Spring turned out to be a huge success as a few Americans gathered round their TVs to watch a dozen or so people march on Washington.

The march was organized to address the Obama administration with a list of grievances that included Benghazi, Obamacare and the legitimacy of the president’s birth certificate.

Organizers of the affair had difficultly assessing the exact number of people in the throng because two or three of them kept moving around.

cop

Cop ticketing a Tea Party protester during massive right wing event. The other protester was arrested and hauled off in a paddy wagon.

An overnight Nielson survey estimated the TV audience set a record for viewership of persons over seventy years of age in the 3:30 PM time slot.

Numbers for younger age groups were not immediately tabulated.

However, a spokesman for the ratings company said he believed the number of younger people who tuned in may have been impacted by a Bowling For Dollars special being broadcast on a competing station.

http://thinkprogress.org/politics/2014/05/16

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Limerick Lunacy.

A fellow who’d once been the beau
Of a princess was told to go blow.
He went into a funk
Till his head he would dunk
In a barrel of Remy Cointreau.
 
cointreau
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
A gal tied her hair in a bow
That covered her bod head to toe.
It was really quite pleasing
Except when she’s sneezing
It reveals hers charms down below.
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A gal tied her hair in a bow
That would hurt making love to a beau
One said “It’s annoying”
When my toy I’m deploying.”
It’s better down there when you mow”
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January 20, 2013

The DC Folly Trolley – 01/20/13

Lisa Defiant

Lisa Murkowski (I-AK) defied the order of Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-KY) to vote to reject an increase in the debt ceiling.

According to a spokesman, McConnell is now suffering from severe constipation since being confronted by the unexpected defiance.

The GOP leader was also angered by a statement from Susan Collins, the Maine Republican, who insisted that the debt ceiling must be raised. So upset was the Kentucky senator at Collins’ betrayal that he apparently confused his Viagra pill with Flomax and has been observed dashing to restrooms with a bulge in his pants.

SUSAN

The ladies strike back. Susan Collins, senator from Maine.

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Mitch McConnell mixed a Viagra
With his Flomax; now goes like Niagara.
To the restroom he keeps dashing
His swollen pants can’t keep from flashing
A bump like a corn ear from ConAgra.

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GOP Offers Debt Limit Increase.

Some members of the House GOP agreed to extend the debt ceiling by three months. However, Democratic Leader Nancy Pelosi rejected the offer demanding a clean increase.

In response, according an anonymous source, the House Republican caucus offered to extend the debt limit for three minutes once a month.

Extending the limit by this number would allow the Treasury to pay all of nation’s debts on time. They’d just have to do it very, very fast.

Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner said he would have to resort to blood doping to move that quickly.

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Right Wing Insists On Benefit Cuts To Pass Budget.

Mitch McConnell once again called for drastic spending cuts if Republicans in the Senate are to vote in favor of a new budget.

McConnell’s statement can be summed up in a few words: Cut Social Security, Medicare and Medicaid benefits.

The senator paused for a moment to reach for a handkerchief to wipe the drool spilling over his lips and down his chin.

The cuts to safety net benefits the senator referred to are nothing new and the benefits are those the vast majority of Americans depend on to maintain a modest lifestyle after retirement.

They are also the benefits Republicans and their benefactors want to get their greedy little hands on either through profitization or tax cuts or both.

In a nutshell, it all boils down to class warfare by the rich upon the rest of us.

The senator again wiped the drool from his chin.

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Chairman Warns Against Afghan Troop Reductions.

Sen. Carl Levin, the Democrat from Michigan who chairs the Armed Services Committee, appealed to President Obama not to reduce the troops in Afghanistan by one third after 2015.

Levin said a substantial force will be needed to combat al Qaeda well beyond the date set by the president.

LEVIN

The $3 trillion dollars in rare natural resources the country possesses had nothing to do with the senator’s appeal.

But, a little here, a little there couldn’t hurt.

Levin, by the way, is one of the senators whose fancy footwork has all but scuttled filibuster reform.

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Sad Times For A Bankster

JPMorgan Chase lost some $6 billion dollars last year due to  risky trading schemes. Because of this trading adventurism El Presidente Jamie Dimon, the leader of the bankster pack, suffered a massive decrease in salary of about one half his previous earnings.

Dimon (perhaps you’ve heard of him in connection with taxpayer bailouts of failed banks that engaged in mortgage fraud practices) whose total compensation package will amount to little more than $11 million dollars this year, is said to be suffering from a malady known to Wall Streeters as Cash Reduction of Annual Pay Syndrome or CRAP.

While few bank CEOs ever contract CRAP, many Street executives live in fear of the syndrome since all are susceptible to the disease when they get caught cheating people out of their investments.

So for those, like Dimon, who get their greedy little fingers entangled in derivative scams and who fall victim to CRAP, here are a few suggestions for coping from The Sardo Institute’s survival manual entitled Getting By On $11 Million Dollars A Year:

  • Omit Beluga from the menu. Switch to a less expensive caviar such as the roe from salmon. One, of course, does have to acquire a taste for the inferior brand. However, the sturgeon population in the Black and Caspian Seas is diminishing and the fish and its eggs could become extinct at some point thereby forcing a switch to less desirable delicacies in the future.  So be the first in your country club….
  • Switch from Dom Perignon to less expensive champagne such as Andre-Brut which a servant can purchase at the local grocery store for five or six bucks a bottle.
  • Serve Gallo Brothers wines at your next shindig. They’re even cheaper when you buy by the gallon. Have your sommelier decant into Dom Perignon empties you’ve accumlated. Who’ll know?
  • Shop around for a country club with cheaper fees. Negotiate with the committee.
  • Dine out less.
  • Learn to tolerate a Big Mac. You’ll discover the intricacies of the delicately blended special sauce and savor the delights of the sesame seed bun.
  • Reduce the household staff.
  • Sell one of the villas.
  • Dock the yacht for a month or two each year. Put the captain on unpaid furlough.

There are many other ways to stretch a budget. With a little imagination you’ll find you too can survive on $11 million dollars a year.

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The rich are in a pickle
With debt ceiling policy now fickle
Where to put all the dough
When government stops the flow
Of interest on bonds that won’t earn a nickel.

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Trillion Dollar Coins Nixed.

President Obama rejected the notion of having the Treasury mint trillion dollar coins as a means of sidestepping the debt ceiling imposed by Congress.

I guess that means my request for two of the coins has been shot down.

The trillion dollar coin has been nixed
So the debt ceiling now can’t be fixed.
Republicans are firm
Making Democrats squirm
But views on the outcome are still mixed.
December 22, 2012

The DC Folly Trolley – 12/22/12

White House Desperate to Save GOP

Fearful that he might otherwise be forced to accept a liberal agenda, President Obama is said to be searching for ways to keep John Boehner’s chestnuts from roasting on an open fire.

It seems to me I’ve heard that song before.

English: U.S. President Barack Obama meets wit...

English: U.S. President Barack Obama meets with Speaker of the House John Boehner during the debt ceiling increase negotiations. The official White House caption says “President Barack Obama meets with Speaker of the House John Boehner on the patio near the Oval Office, Sunday, July 3, 2011. (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza” (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

It’s like old times.

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Here’s the skinny and if you haven’t heard about it you need to tear up your Mayan calendar, come up out of the shelter and read the newspapers – if you can still find one.

Boehner proposed what he called “Plan B”, a scheme which would raise taxes only on incomes over $1,000,000, and then sent it to the House for a vote. He soon realized nobody gives a shit what he thinks anymore and was unable to corral enough Republican votes to pass the plan. So he tucked tail, withdrew the bill and slinked away.

Meanwhile, back at the White House, the president is said to be fearful that Democrats might win the House in the 2014 elections if he can’t find a way to rescue Boehner from the black hole of GOP political shenanigans.

Should the GOP go down to utter defeat, the president reasons, he might be compelled to accept the evil liberal agenda and, in so doing, abide by the will of the people, dreadful thought though that is in Follyland these days.

By contrast, Plan B will make anything Obama offers look good, regardless of how outrageous it might be.

Look for Obama to draw yet another line in the water at $500,000 for tax cuts. He will also chain Social Security to a new CPI, a move that will cut already inadequate benefits to an even more drastic level.  Will he or won’t he buy into the health care cost shifting scheme of raising the Medicare qualifying age to 67? When Obama is negotiating, nothing is final.  

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In a similar vein, some time ago Nancy Pelosi abandoned her liberal economic leanings and announced she could support a deficit reduction plan along the lines of Obama’s Bowles/Simpson Cat Food Commission proposal. You remember, the failed plan killed overwhelmingly by the Committee members and that Obama keeps resurrecting.

President Barack Obama and Speaker of the Hous...

President Barack Obama and Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi at the US Capitol. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The happy couple in happier times.

Along with massive tax cuts, that Commission advocated cuts to Social Security by binding the program to the inflation index called the chained CPI. Pelosi embraced the plan along with the SS reductions it included.

Both she and Obama strongly advocated for the cuts referring to them as a means to strengthen the nation’s retirement benefit plan.

Well, bless my soul, another DINO rises from the ashes of Obama’s 2010 election conflagration.

Pelosi did a political voltafaccia* and will now agree to whatever it is Obama sacrifices in negotiations with Republicans – Medicare, Social Security, tax cuts for the rich. Whatever! It doesn’t matter. Pelosi’s on board calling all of Obama’s safety net cuts “strengthening the program.”

VOLTAFACCIA

(Courtesy La Gazzetta di Viareggio by La Gazzetta di Viareggio is licensed under aCreative Commons Attribuzione – Non commerciale – Condividi allo stesso modo 3.0 Italia License)..

Reports have it that Pelosi’s turnabout was the result of strong-arm tactics by the White House which threatened to remove her from the leadership position she now occupies if she didn’t play ball. So she’s learned to throw the curve, the screwball and the cutter.

UPW correspondents also learned from an anonymous source that the minority leader was invited for a weekend of waterboarding at Gitmo before she finally recanted her liberal views toward the safety net.

According to the report, when Pelosi was questioned about the incident, she responded, “So I got a little thirsty.”

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In any case, regarding “strengthening,” I’ve come up with a few ideas.

How about we strengthen Pelosi out of her leadership role and reform her to her original House role as a regular representative.

And if Barack Obama doesn’t come around and advocate for the issues he was elected to support, then liberals should reject his proposals, vote them down in the Senate and House and strengthen his position to a lame duck status even before his second term inauguration takes place.

Reform in this manner could well serve we, the majority of the people.

*(Translation: Volte-facia).

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Here’s some good news: Obama backed off his original negotiating demands.

The bad news: He isn’t finished negotiating.

God only knows where the Medicare qualifying age will land. And I have an unsettled feeling the Almighty is on Boehner’s side.

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The chained CPI, which Obama agreed to and now doesn’t, wouldn’t be a bad idea if the president could only convince seniors to eat dried generic cat food with a little powdered milk.

Makes sense.  When you can’t afford to buy filet mignon the next logical purchase is feline cuisine.

That of course would be the first step. The next president could reduce the COLA even further.

Seniors could then pick through the dumpsters behind fast food restaurants. That doesn’t cost anything. We would then have a Z- CPI, that is, a zero inflation index.

Of course, seniors would have to be means tested to be allowed to pick through dumpsters. They would also need a photo ID called the Obamacard.

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In keeping with the need to reduce the cost of health care, the Sardo Institute of Medical Supplies is offering a do-it-yourself open heart surgery kit.

For the low, low price of $19.95 you can have at your finger tips your very own open heart surgery packet complete with instructions. The kit includes everything you need to perform a medically approved operation.

And if you act right now we’ll include a second kit absolutely free, just pay shipping and handling.

And be sure to ask about our hip and knee replacement kits to increase your health care savings even more.

Just send $19.95 plus $5.95 shipping and handling to:

The Sardo Institute
PO Box 555 5555
Pasta Fagioli, Italy

Cash only please.

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Speaking of the Mayan calendar, I checked the Internet all day on Dec. 21 and couldn’t find a single report proclaiming the world had ended. If anyone has any evidence that proves the world ended on that long anticipated day, please respond via the comments section.

I’ve been waiting for years for the mother of all fireworks displays and nothing has happened. Not yet anyway. What a bummer!

December 21. 2012.

The world would end at dawn today
I thought not to join the fray
So safely behind I gladly stayed
No never mind to the fuss I paid
Hoping to watch the fireworks display.
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Alas it was never meant to be
The world now celebrates with glee
But never defy a Mayan seer
You’ll end up crouching in great fear
Begging forgiveness with a forlorn plea.
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With a seer you never trifle
He’ll send your way an awful eyeful.
To display of his ancient might
He’ll mark you in his dreadful sight.
As demons and monsters your life ‘ll stifle.

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Santa Saves The Day.

Sends Rudolph To Ward Off Mayan Demons.

Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer became a hero for the second time in his centuries old life. You’ll recall that some decades ago Rudolph with his nose so bright guided Santa’s sleigh through the fog one Christmas eve.

The Mayan demons apparently mistook Rudolph for a human being.

That’s a human,” one demon was overheard saying. “Holy shit, we’ve got the wrong planet.” And off they went on a new mission.

Look for Jupiter to explode on December 25th, 2013 the day the demons are expected to arrive at that planet.

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OK, OK, I know it’s bullshit. But it’s Saturday night and I got good at bullshiting back when I was still dating. Worked then. Doesn’t anymore.

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Speaking of Santa Claus, we know he knows whose naughty or nice. But here’s a secret. Don’t breathe a word to anyone.  Did you know that Santa himself prefers naughty.

SEXY GIRL 1

Naughty Santa!

Related articles

November 4, 2011

The Folly Trolley

Facebook Raids Panty Column. Claims Crotch Exposure Too Risque For FB Members. Squelches Article.

Love the little number called The Bow Back Lace Thong. It’s really cute. The color is to die for. Itches a little though.

Gives me some ideas for a designer jock strap. Sequins anyone.

Read the Article at HuffingtonPost.

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A jockstrap viewed from the side.

That thar thang is a jock strap.  Could use a little sprucin’ up don’t ya thank?


thong

Image via Wikipedia

That thar is a thong.  Best not get your thangs and your thongs mixed up.  That goes double for football players.

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Tony Perkin, president of the Family Research Council (FRC) and CNN pundit today awarded deadbeat dad Joe Walsh (who in addition to being a deadbeat is also a Repub. Congressman from Illinois) a 100% rating for his unconditional support of families for all families except his own. The FRCins gave the deadbeat the True Blue Member of Congress award for supporting family values.

For the FRCins, stiffing your own kids is of no consequence. The FRCins are a very understanding group as is readily apparent by the presentation. After all how can a deadbeat dad provide for his own kids’ needs after he’s just spent some heavy bucks on a vacation on the Italian Riviera with his new girlfriend. Yes, indeed. Very understandable. Right, FRCins. Next award from the family values organization is sure to be “Let’s Give Deadbeat Dads a Break.”

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Don’t look now but Nancy Pelosi has just become a Blue Dog Democrat, what I call a BS Dem, BS for Backstabber. She said the other day that cuts to the social safety net may be necessary if the rich – like Nancy Pelosi – are to pay higher taxes. What she means of course if taxes for the wealthy are raised a tinsy winsy bit, the 99% must chip in a boatload.

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Pelosi and Obama before they stabbed each other in the back.

Pelosi and Obama before they stabbed each other in the back. Image via Wikipedia

Pelosi now joins other backstabbing Democrats ala Barack Obama who will gladly diminish the social welfare of the vast majority of Americans so the rich can skate.

I wonder who whispered in her ear? The right wing White House no doubt. Play ball on this one Nancy or you get no support from us – the Russ Feingold treatment no doubt.

It seems the only politicians the White House strong arms are the liberals.

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Have you heard? Republicans want to tax the poor to help save the rich who are so overburdened with taxes they might have to reduce the protection money they pay to the mobsters in Congress. That’ll be the day.

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Republicans are complaining about wasteful spending. One of the projects they called wasteful was a turtle tunnel in Florida. Sounds a little weird, a turtle tunnel.  But not so fast.

The turtle tunnel saves the lives of turtles who would otherwise  cross a highway that divides two lakes. I would imagine the tunnel saves the lives of thousands upon thousands of turtles every year and quite possibly eliminates a road hazard.

In any case the tunnel represents the kind, humane and gentle nature of mankind.

There is a dark side to humanity. It is on view in the photo that accompanies the article.

Republicans

McConnell is a species unto himself. Scientists need to analyze his DNA to determine exactly where along the evolutionary scale he belongs. If I had to venture a guess I would say somewhere below the insects. 

Read the Article at HuffingtonPost

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NASA says if life exists on Mars it is probably underground. When they dig, I hope they don’t find oil. We’ll send troops if they do.